Spinach: Zombie Sheep (part 1).

There are people in this world who don’t quite fit into society.  

            If people were puzzle pieces, they would be the unidentified extras, the empty gaps,     
               the soggy chewed up pieces that fall off the table and get noshed on by the dog.
  

They live their lives feeling unnecessary, lost, destroyed.  In a world that celebrates conformity, if not uniformity, allowances are made for puzzle pieces to be different shapes, colors, and sizes.

But if they don’t fit together, they’re either pounded on until they do, or thrown away.  

Rejected.  

Not because they’re of less worth than any other piece.  All puzzle pieces are simply shaped bits of cardboard, after all.  But because their purpose is not immediately visible.  

Okay, that said, I’m not a fan of misfits, myself included.  They’re awkward and annoying and sometimes they want to kill you.  But they play an important role in society, I would argue even a critical role.  

There is a need for every single one of them.  

A purpose.  

A reason.  

So, if you feel like a misfit, just send me two hundred dollars and I’ll mail you my special pamphlet, titled:  “You’re So Special:  Why you are important to society even if you’ve lived your whole life being told otherwise.”  This pamphlet will explore this topic further, telling you all the things you thought you would be told in this article, and filling you in on the deepest secrets of the universe which you never thought you could know.  For an extra $399.99, you could also buy a signed copy of my autobiography:  “Puzzle Piece to President:  How I overcame obstacles and made three million close personal friends while becoming rich and famous, and how you can do the same!”  

To be cont.  (obviously...if you haven’t figured it out, there isn’t nothing I loathe more than a click-bait-y article.  I would never leave you hanging like that, and I know you’re just dying to hear my opinion on why weirdos should be proud of themselves instead of skulking in the gutters.  Plus, we haven’t even gotten to the Zombie Sheep yet, and that’s the best part!)